Buy, bye,. Byers?

Scuse me!
Yes?
We bought some shares so that we could get rich, quick.
Great, how did you get on?
We didn’t get rich.
Erm…
We got poor.
And I should care because…?
We think that the government should compensate us.
Nah!
Why?
That’ll be something to do with the way that a free market economy works.

Suspicion

There are sinister happenings, erm, happening in our office today. A finely honed team spirit has been dashed on the dark jagged rocks of transgression. Stinking, skeletal tendrils of suspicion swirl in the foetid air like a filthy grey fog, probing, searching, intent on outing the evil bastard wot done it. A sacred trust has been broken. Fingers are being pointed. People are gathering in small groups, eyes furtively scanning the room for clues, whispering, accusing, searching for someone to blame; desperately trying to make sense of the carnage that greeted them when they came into work today to find that some psychopathic madman has taped their mouses to their mousemats.

I don’t know how much longer I can go on – get me out of this hell hole!